I’ve ordered an Indian, I’ve snacked on some junk and I’ve got some “reality” TV on in the background (Married At First Sight)… let the blogging commence.


You might have realised I was in some shock yesterday and pretty pissed over the whole Brexit result. I’m over it now. The only way forward is to plan and plan some more so that’s what I’ve been doing!

To plan for the next 5 or 10 or however many years isn’t easy! I don’t know why I thought it would be but I guess we don’t consider all the aspects that make a life and have to be considered when planning. My plan had to include things like:

  • Learning Goals
  • Career Goals
  • Relationship Goals
  • Financial Goals
  • Lifestyle Goals
  • Spirituality Goals
  • Health Goals
  • Relocation Goals
  • Family Goals
  • Recreation Goals
  • Other Goals

That’s a lot of goals right? But it’s so necessary when planning seriously, otherwise it can go completely left. So I whipped up a cuppa, put down the mag and threw on my headphones for musical inspiration.

My initial struggles started at Learning & Career goals so you can tell this planning was going to take some time and be a problem: I know what career I want in the UK but I have plans to relocate which means my UK goals might not be acceptable – or as attractive – for my relocation goals. Deciding what to learn also depends on this so I am kind of at a junction right now deciding whether to take a completely new career path to be more attractive for relocating or to stick with what I want and hope to get by.

Relationship goals are tricky considering all that has happened in the last few years (click here if you’re not sure what I’m referring to!). Marriage is on  the cards somewhere but getting our own home is more important right now so I think I will say to be engaged by 2020 would be nice if everything works out.

Financial goals are covered in every other goal practically: saving to buy a home, saving to relocate, buying said home, relocating, earning enough money to do all of that plus any additional learning etc. Money makes me sad and stressed so I try to leave Mr.Me to deal with it.

Lifestyle is easier in the sense that I don’t smoke and I rarely drink so it’s not something I have to worry about knocking on the head. I guess trying to knock off the attention whore stuff would be good, sticking to CBT for as long as I need to and taking my anxiety meds for as long as I need to.

I’m a Christian. A failing one but one nonetheless. So my spirituality goals would definitely be to make time for God, learn to love myself as I should spiritually and become a better Christian.

Managing my anxiety, getting to and keeping to a healthy BMI, sticking to a clean and beneficial diet and exercising regularly are my current health goals (failing) and future health goals (I will get there!).

My relocation goals are to either be living in Ontario, Canada or Wellington, New Zealand by 2020. I’m more inclined to New Zealand; Mr.Me is more inclined to Canada (and more recently Switzerland?!)… either way we both want to move. The initial issue with New Zealand is the perception of a not-so-warm reception for ethnic minorities. You probably don’t know but we are not caucasian. I’m happy to go along and find out how true this is. Mr.Me is happier to go somewhere where it isn’t going to be an issue but seems to forget neither of us speak any French and I really don’t like the cold. This is my biggest and most exciting and scary goal which I think about literally every day.


I’ve missed about 3 things from the list: recreation, family and other but only because they’re not very big or exciting topics in my opinion. Recreationally, I want to have fun whether that be by exercise, reading books or jogging; dates or whatever. Family wise I am not fussed about children right now and I feel like there is enough goals here to last a lifetime before adding any Others to the list!

I’ve got notes all over the house on Visa’s, jobs, wages, houses and budgeting etc. I think Mr.Me is a bit confused but impressed with my sudden desire to plan as long as I discuss it with my therapist to make sure it’s not an anxious reaction to the Brexit decision and is something that I actually want.


Do you have a plan for life? A dream board? A to-do list? I can’t be the only person that needs to have literal plans to feel more comfortable about the future…


12 thoughts on “Life Planning 101

      • I see and I will try to not spoiler alert you haha. I agree though and for the most part your thought has been correct. Some of these people shouldn’t have been matched I think, at least on the surface it seems that way but I think the main thing is people don’t want to work at it. It’s almost like they don’t really want to fully commit to the process because life isn’t going to be instantly perfect just because you’re in an instant marriage.

        Liked by 1 person

  1. It doesn’t make sense because if you’re that committed to being married to marry a stranger, doesn’t logic say you would try your hardest to make it work because you want it so bad?! Or what was the whole point? People have arranged marriages all the time and it’s not optional so I dunno. Suck it up lol


    • I hear ya on that! Yeah I mean if it were me in the situation I would work at it as hard as I could. Because I knew there was something the matchmakers saw that made us a great match. It may not be apparent right off, hell I may not be initially physically, sexually attracted to them. Let me tell ya something though. Looks can go south real quick in my mind. You can be the hottest looking woman ever but if we don’t connect, if you’re not a good person and we don’t click then you can get ugly real quick to me, I don’t care what you look like in yoga pants. Beyond that though I know marriage is hard work. I didn’t know how hard before I got married but in the situation, you’ve gotta work at it constantly. It’s not easy. I still go back to there being something that drew them together from the “experts” and I wish these couples would dig deep to realize this and that you have to give a little bit to get and make it work. The success rate on this show isn’t good but again I don’t think they’re trying hard enough.


      • I agree with everything you said. But easy come, easy go. Most people have to work hard at a relationship before getting married which makes them sometimes less likely to throw it all away. These people had a marriage handed to them on a plate. If it doesn’t work, we can “just” get a divorce because it’s not like we had to work for anything.


  2. Yep so we skip the step of the relationship to instant marriage. I would think that would make it more worth trying to repair than some non-committal situation. Good thing there’s no kids involved. I wouldn’t think they would have that kind of scenario though, that would get really messy really quick. Have you seen the Single Dad Seeking show? Not sure if we’ve exported that one to y’all yet. But a lot of winners on that one too haha.


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